Ideally, this intro should incorporate a number of double entendres that relate to football and sex/siring a child. So, something along the lines of shooting and dribbling inside the box would be good. And thinking about it, that old gag about the manager pulling someone off at half-time is pretty good too. Shame that it’s not really relevant.
Ah well, the intro’s done now and you already know what the piece is going to be about from the headline anyway, so let’s get cracking, eh?
1 . IAN WRIGHT
Given that he didn’t turn professional until he was 22, the gold-toothed Gooner had an impressive career on the pitch. Capped for England 33 times, his club honours for Arsenal include winners medals in the League and FA Cups in 1993 and in the Cup Winners’ Cup in 1994. Despite having retired in 2000, Wright’s name is still appearing on Premiership scoresheets thanks to his two sons. Chelsea’s Shaun Wright- Phillips could prove to be a potential England star this summer and his little bro’ Manchester City star Bradley is just a few lightning fast strides behind him. VERDICT: DEVASTATING
2. FRANK LAMPARD SR
The former England fullback and two-time FA Cup winner with West Ham United is not just the dad of one of the most improved players in English football in recent years – he’s also Jamie Redknapp’s uncle. Ol’ man Lampard worked as Harry Redknapp’s number two when he was managing the Hammers, and was singlehandedly responsible for bringing his boy up through the ranks at West Ham. Good job he did, for England’s sake. VERDICT: EFFECTIVE
3. CESARE MALDINI
One of ‘the’ faces of Italian football, ol’ pa Cesare lofted the European Cup as a Defender with AC Milan in 1963, before taking on the manager’s job in 1973 and then going on to become the national squad manager in 1996.We last saw him on a touchline as Paraguay’s coach during the 2002 World Cup, but his son, Paulo, is still very much in the public eye having defended peerlessly for AC Milan and Italy since 1985. He’s signed up with AC until at least 2007. VERDICT: THE DADDY
4. PELE
When the Brazilian maestro became a dad in August 1970, there was never really any doubt as to what Edson Chobli Nascimiento would eventually do for a living. Well, that’s not strictly true because most Brazilians thought he would become a striker, but he ended up in goal for Santos – which was a shrewd move as he shirked the dreaded finger of direct comparison. VERDICT: UNRIVALED
5. JOHAN CRUYFF
Truly one of the greats both as a player and a manager, having won European Footballer of the Year three times and dominated world football in the early 1970s with Ajax. As a manager, the Flying Dutchman took Barca to unrivalled glory, masterminding a haul of 11 trophies in eight years. Despite a spell at Old Trafford, his son – Jordi, wasn’t all that. VERDICT: SUPERIOR
6. JEAN DJORKAEFF
Hailing from the Cancasus region of Armenia, defender Jean pitched up in France in the 1950s and ended up playing 47 times for the national squad. His son Youri has bettered this with 83 caps (so far) and is a former World Cup winner (1998). The superb forward was in integral part of France’s European Championship winning squad, but now plays for sparkly Yank team, The MetroStars. VERDICT: WORLD-BEATING
7. SIR ALEX FERGUSON
The former Glasgow Rangers player and embattled (of late) Manchester United boss had his son, Darren, playing for him for a while at Old Trafford. Imagine having ‘The Hairdryer’ as both your boss and father for a moment and you’ll soon understand why Darren hotfooted it over to Wolverhampton and latterly Wrexham. That said, we suspect Ferguson Junior wasn’t really good enough for a place in United’s squad in the first place. VERDICT: SCARY
8. EUSEBIO
Though born in Mozambique, Eusebio made an enormous impact on Portuguese (and indeed world) football in the 1960s, thanks to his lightning fast acceleration and perfect finishing. In his spectacular career he played 715 games and scored 727 goals. His son, Roberto Rios, however, has had something of a dazzling fall from grace. Once Spain’s most expensive defender, he’s now a West Brom reject. VERDICT: IMPRESSIVE
9. KLAUS SAMMER
Back in the pre-Hasslehoff days of West and East Germany, Klaus was a shining light of the Eastern Bloc team. The defender’s rei of glory came when he reached the World Cup finals in 1974 and won the Olympic title in 1976, and he’s still working as a trainer to this day. His boy, Matthias, was perhaps a better player, having been a lynchpin of the triumphant German Euro 1996 team. VERDICT: NOTABLE
10. LORENZO SANZ
Granted, he wasn’t much cop in his playing days for lowly Spanish side Puerto Bonita, but the former President of Real Madrid and current Chairman of Parma FC, can certainly score off the pitch. He produced two professional footballing sons: Fernando, who plays in defence for Malaga and Paco, who used to play for Racing Santander. VERDICT: INSPIRING
